TGIF

Best part of the week: After months of needing a new phone I finally got one. There was a great Black Friday deal so I jumped on it and upgraded from an iPhone 6s to an XR - life feels luxy.

Worst part of the week: I didn’t have a worst part. Well traffic sucks going into and coming out of Vancouver, but that’s too easy. I think the “worst” part was really just the “hardest” part. And the hardest part of my week was multiple instances of talking about the dream that didn’t actualize. I’ve come to terms with it - the fact that I can talk about it without crying says a lot - but it still feels hard. And having to do it more than once in a week felt like a lot. Buuuuut…

Something I’m excited for: I feel like I’m getting some of my strength back. Not physical strength - that wouldn’t be coming back, as it has yet to really exist - but my personal, inner strength. A couple of times this week I was given opportunities to either submit to old ways of shutting down at conflict or giving in to avoid it all together. But thrice I did the opposite of what I wanted to do and instead stood in my opinion and my belief, defended it from a grounded place, and let it be ok that it differed from the person I was talking to. Sure they were small differences and I may not have been the most graceful in my defence but hearing myself stand up for my position and not back down just because it was different from someone whose opinion I place great weight on felt good. So I’m excited to reconnect with the me I thought I might have left back in Victoria, for many reasons but a large one is thaaaat…

Something I’m grateful for: In reconnecting with her (the me I thought I’d left in Vic) I think I settled in a little bit softer to being here for the holidays.

I didn’t think I’d be here this Christmas - here, not only Canada but also here with my family. When I thought about Christmas earlier this year I saw myself living in my camper on the back of my truck somewhere sunny and above single digit temperatures. I thought I’d be spending Christmas near a beach, quietly reflecting on the year and planning my route further south. I was sort of looking forward to a super nontraditional holiday season with a Christmas that looked nothing like what I’d grown up with. It’s been hard to let that go. I mean the whole thing has been hard to let go of, really, but this Christmas thing has tripped me up a bit. But this week, in reconnecting with a higher me, I feel like I’m ready to - or am maybe just a little bit more open to the idea of - letting go and settling in (and my monthly forecast from Teledipity might have also played a role). So this week I’m grateful that I got to reconnect with the me I thought I might have left in Victoria. The me that trusts in the universe. The me that see people and knows she can help. The me that has opinions and beliefs that differ from the people around her and is ok to stand firm in them even though it might shake the boat. She’s great. She’s strong, she’s soft, she’s open, and she’s ready to show up.

64. What Are You Most Looking Forward To In The Next 10 Years? Whaaaat a fitting question as we come to the end of this decade and the start of the next! This is the kind of question I’d like to sit with for a long time with cup of coffee and my favourite Muji pen and my leather bound notebook and really dive into. It’s powerful manifestation shit right here and I want to really give it the attention it deserves. But for the sake of writing this post I’ve given it a medium amount of thought and done a quick little heart check in and here’s where I’ve arrived:

The thing I’m most looking forward to in the next 10 years is connection and reconnection, in all their forms. I’m looking forward to all of the people I’m going to meet and interact with who will teach me, challenge me, inspire me, and expand me. I’m looking forward to meeting a partner who I connect with deeply and who I can share life experiences with. I’m looking forward to reconnecting more with my self and to where we came from. I’m looking forward to getting into nature more and reconnecting with the earth.

What are you looking forward to in the next 10 years? Where do see yourself? What do you want to accomplish? What don’t you want to do?

Until next time!